Monday, April 25, 2011

Easter and Apologies

I'm sorry I've been gone so long... again.

My computer went through this MASSIVE virus and wiped EVERYTHING and I didn't have any safe access to a computer to visit blogger for at least two months or so. It's also been ultra busy around here with exams and holidays...

I also haven't felt like I deserve to be here.

I'm at a really bad place at the moment.

Probably the worst I've been in ages. Basically, it's been school holidays and lots of people have noticed my weight loss and were making me eat. Once I go over my days calorie limit I think "what the heck" and then go overboard. There have also been a couple of parties I've been to where I've drunkenly told two of my friends (boys) everything. Anyway, so, it's holidays and Easter has just passed and people have been forcing food down my throat so now I think I'm the heaviest I've ever been. I'm so fat. It's disgusting. My belly potrudes so much.

Yet, none of this has driven me enough to excercise and restrict.

I feel like such a failure.

I've lost all motivation.

I also feel horrible for not frequenting blogger and supporting all you lovely lovely people.

I hate myself right now.

The last two days I've been stuffing myself with chocolate in hope to get rid of it all.

I am so disgusting. You should all un-follow me.

I am such a sad excuse for an anorexic.
I think that I might have anorexia/binge eating disorder. If that even works.

I can't get over how fat I've become.

I'm meant to be the skinny one out of all my friends.

I've let everyone down.

I've let you all down.

Oh gosh I love you all so so so so so so so much. Thank you all 96 of you for following me. I'm going to try extra hard to catch up on all your blogs.

I love you all unbelievably much.

Love Anafly



  1. oh, i'm so sorry you have gone through all this... hope everything is better now... *hugs

  2. Oh darling, I'm sorry life is giving you troubles right now :(. I know you are strong enough to get through this. Look on the bright side: People never force fatties to eat; they only want skinny people to get bigger. Obviously you are put in the skinny people catergory!

  3. you havnt let us down. we are happy to hear from you. im sure u arent as fat as you think you are... any bet you are a skinnie minnie and you just think you look bigger than you are. cheer up beautiful.Xo

  4. ohh anafly, its alright. just get back up and dust it off. Remember why youve held on for so long. and we will never unfollow you! your amazing. hope all goes well


  5. Awet sweetie. :( I hate to see you in so much pain/self hate...

    I personally think you are beautiful and amazing, and I just wish you saw that in yourself... <3

    Times will look up, I promise! Just think, Spring is here, flowers are blooming... and the sun is just starting to warm the earth...

    It is a new beginning, you got this!
    Do what you think is best for you.
    Do what makes you happy.
    Whether it is losing weight
    or jumping rope...
    just do what makes you happy -
    Life is way too short to do otherwise...

    If you ever need a ear or someone to talk too,
    I'll be here. :)


  6. i'm sorry u feel bad :(
    just remember,
    ur not alone. :)
    i kno this has nothing to do with this post, but i was wondering if u could answer a question...
    ( u don't have to, its really personal, but i really need help)
    hav u gotten ur period back?
    cuz i havn't had mine in over almost two years.
    my mom doesn't kno.
    i don't kno wat to do.

    thank u

  7. you're the most beautiful, beautiful thing, precious. You are. x

  8. miss you havent emailed me in ages.
    but i guess i'll forgive you... :-)
    Your post is extremely sad because I know we can all relate to it.
    *cuggle* (cuddle and snuggle, got it off suit life on deck ha)
    but i've missed you so much and you know what? it can always be reversed. dont waste all that hard work you've done. the starving, the excersise, what its done to your mind. you are so close. I adore you. I miss you.
    Anytime you need to vent just email me and as soon as I get it I'll email you back with love and understanding.


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